Crystal Gravy 11/01/2009
 
Back in the days of awesome SNL, there was the most amazing of commercials--Crystal Gravy.  I can still here the song, and read the words: "right now America is eating crystal gravy."  Yum.  (I'd watch the video, but I'm in Canada and there's that whole region thing that's really annoying.  Oh you Americans, you think you're so smart, banning internet videos from your friendly (and runtish) little sister up north. Maybe we should ban basketball from you--we came up with it, afterall...Ha! Take that.  Then you could figure out how an old Jack Nickolson would meet young girls!)

Mmm, Crystal Gravy.  So gross looking, yet so clear, so crystal, so refreshing!  And that's how I feel right now.  Kind of refreshed.  I know that I am dead and exhausted, beaten down and overworked (and incredibly underpaid--I'm a student, it costs me to do homework (that's the "gross looking part of being gravy)), but I feel like I can actually manage all that's coming at me.  Maybe, just maybe I'll survive it. 

Ha, who am I kidding?  Of course I'll survive!  I lived through my grade 8 band trip (which I was told not to fall asleep on, because I wouldn't be waking up!  Gah!  Can you believe that?  Death threats in grade 8?  Really?  But don't you girls think for an instant that I regret winning that badminton game that started it all!).  I survived a rollover car accident.  Thrice we rolled, and I actually walked away.  Litterally.  We were stranded 10 or 15 miles from civilization in November, so if I wanted to get anywhere, I had to walk.  And what a beautiful sight Kenora was in the end (and yes, Charles, I forgive you for destroying my car.  You're lucky I hadn't named him yet.).  I even survived my journey through time, back to good old 1955 when I met my parents and my mom started falling in love with me and my dad was kind of a loser, but I brought them together anyway at the Under the Sea Dance and restored the lives of my brother, my sister and me.

Erm, wait a minute, maybe that last one wasn't me, but it sounds like something I did...

Hmm.  Hoverboards.  Remember when people started saying that they were real and were being sold for millions of dollars?  I think I wanted one; I'm not really sure. I know my husband did, at least according to him 20-some years later, but I don't know if I did.  I probably didn't because everyone else wanted one and I was going through my "do anything to be different" stage. 

Enough!  I should be talking about Crystal Gravy!  That's the one thing I am really looking forward to.  Just finish this current assignment, and I can bathe in Crystal Gravy if I want to! 

Of course I wouldn't, because that's just gross and the stuff also isn't highly available.  Hmm, that could be a problem.
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